Please help

First, I hope I am posting in the right groups. I've only posted a little bit on newsgroups, but I am desperate now.

My cat, Widdershins, was killed today. I want to drink, and I want to use.

I just don't know where to turn. I'm praying, going to meetings, calling my sponsor, but all I can think about is what I KNOW will end the pain (at lease temporarily.) I can hardly stand it another minute. Please hlep. I guess I'm just posting this because its too late to call my sponsor again, and I've already worn them out. I am afraid to go in the room where her empty catbox is. I am afraid to eat, since I now I will look in the cupboard and find some of her food or treats. I can't stand to look at the cockatiel remembering how she used to watch him so intently and how there is no sane reason he should outlive her. Please, someone help.

Brad - I am so sorry your cat was killed. I am a great cat lover myself and know what it is like.

Sometimes pain is good - it means you won't forget. It will mean Widdershins will stay in your memory for ever.

You WILL be able to get through this, hard though it is.

It's just one of those things that you have to accept because you can't change it. Pets die. People die. I'm going to die and so are you. Maybe Widdershins is really in cat heaven. Lots of mice and birds around.

One thing that really won't help is drinking or using. You know where that is going to lead. We have to face pain and live with it since it appears to be part of the human condition. So is joy. That will come again soon enough. Be well. Call your sponsor in the morning.

little bit on newsgroups, but I am desperate now. My cat, Widdershins, was killed today. I want to drink, and I want to use. I just don't know where to turn. I'm praying, going to meetings, calling my sponsor, but all I can think about is what I KNOW will end the pain (at lease temporarily.) I can hardly stand it another minute. Please hlep. I guess I'm just posting this because its too late to call my sponsor again, and I've already worn them out. I am afraid to go in the room where her empty catbox is. I am afraid to eat, since I now I will look in the cupboard and find some of her food or treats. I can't stand to look at the cockatiel remembering how she used to watch him so intently and how there is no sane reason he should outlive her. Please, someone help. Brad

Hi Brad,

First let me tell you how sorry I am that you lost your kitty. That is terrible. I lost a cat the same way once, so I know how it feels.

Using drugs or drinking is not the answer to forgetting. All that will do is mask the pain for a time. Once you come down, or sober up, you will remember and be in pain again. The only thing that using or drinking is going to do is delay the inevitable. Deal with the pain now while it is fresh and get it over with.

Stay sober and clean, and get in touch with your sponsor as soon as possible. If you are in the recovery process, the last thing you want to do is pick it up again.

Also, contact some of the pet loss support groups suggested by others on here. It is a very painful thing that you are going through and there are many people who can't cope without some help. Just try to focus on the fun times you shared with Widderkins, rather than her death.

Best of luck to you, and please stay strong.

I am so sorry. I know how absolutley devastating this can be. Please consider going to the alt.support.grief.pet-loss board and www.petloss.com. There are many people who will be able to help you through this.

Karen

I know how horrible it can be to lose your cat. I just went through this right before Christmas. You loved your cat and he loved you. I hope this doesn't come off wrong but because your cat loved you, he wouldn't want you to do anything that wasn't good for you. He wouldn't want you to drink because of him. Is there any way you can go over to a sober friend's house? Or maybe just stay online? Go for a long walk?

For every person, the answer is different. Try thinking of Widdershins

Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Karen.

Will you be on any of those message boards?

I perceive you are a prophet, OrangeFluffy. This is exactly the same line as my own thinking. I'm going to take a pause from posting and start meditating on Widdershins, alive and happy, saying 'meaow meawow' (meaning 'don't take that first drink' in cat language.}

Sorry to hear about your lost, Brad.

Coincidentally, do you happen to know a person named Rebecca F.?

Poor little cat. Drowning is such a terrible way for a cat to pass away. Excuse me... I have fits of weeping. I did, and she sent me to a full day of meetings. I did not even wait to be called on, but asked to share right off. I have shared and shared all day, and the agony is still razor sharp. How I want a big tumbler of booze to soothe it! But Widdershins would not have wanted me to drink. When I used to drink she would hiss at me as if I were a stranger. No. Maybe if I made Widdershins my temporary higher power? Brad

Brad,

Making Widdershins your higher power (even if only temporarily) is an excellent idea. Not only will you honour her by thinking of her in such a way, you will also honour her by staying clean and sober ... which is what she would want. If she hissed at you when you drank, then she will hiss again...all you have to do is listen with your heart.

Stay strong and you will make it.